Deadpool and Bullseye: Assassins Gamble
by Deadpool uk
Summary: This is my first fan fic here at this site. Bullseye gets hired for a job. One problem, when his job goes well, he makes a powerfull enemy! Bullseye needs to find a way out of this sticky situation so who does he call? The merc with a mouth! In this actio
1. Chapter 1

**Bullseye and Deadpool: Assassins gamble**

"I killed two of Daredevil's grilfriends! Not to mention beating him as well on a few ocassions. I'm the great Bullseye! So how am I in this mess?" thought Bullseye as another blow to the head made him fall to his knees. He could feel the blood drip down his face. His head felt like it was about to split in two. He could feel his stomach swelling. He looked up to see the huge muscle bound man raise his fist for another. He closed his eyes. This was it. The end of Bullseye. After all this he was going to die tied up on his bedroom floor. Wearing nothing but his underwear. Not beaten down at the hands of Daredevil. Not shot down by the poilce helicopter. Not even shot dead by a nervous police officer.

It seemed like forever, facing the floor, eyes closed, waiting for the punch. But it never came. "Open your eyes Bullseye." The voice didn't come from the man who was pummeling him. It came from his door. Slowly, Bullseye opened one eye, looking up to check it was safe. In the door way stood a second man. He was posh looking, a nice clean jacket with a shirt and tie underneath and held a kaine that had a diamond on the end. "Greetings my young friend. I doubt you ever seen me before no?" Bullseye lookedhim up and down. It was impossible for him to speak, the tape around his mouth had made sure of that. He shook his head slwoy, making sure the sudden movement wouldn't damage him anymore. "I see. Well then, an introduction is necessary. My name is Charles Beckett. The name ring a bell?"

"Beckett? The name certainly rings a bell. I... no... Kenny Beckett? That's how I got into this mess." That took Bullseye back a few weeks.

Bullseye was outside a nightclub, disguised in civillian clothing. Leaning against a wall, he looked at everyone who entered the club. Everytime, he checked the photo in his hand. No such luck yet. It took about another half an hour, but eventually, he showed up. Taking out his lighter, Bullseye burnt the photo as he began to follow his target, who was guarded by another 2 men. He ducked into the shadows every few seconds, making sure he remained hidden.

As they headed round the corner of the back of the club, Bullseye began to ran to catch up. Reaching the corner, he pressed himself up against the wall and peeked round. The three had entered a door in the back of the building. The door was guarded by another man who was well built. As his target went through the door, Bullseye stepped round the corner approaching the guard.

"Hey, no one allowed in this way. Take yer ass round to the front."

"What? Do you know who you are talking to boy? I am the owner of this club!"

"Let's see some proof."

"You want proof, I'll give you proof." Bullseye reached into a pocket, producing a small rectangular shaped card. It had a photo of him on it and said goodbye in big black letters.

"Goodbye? What?" Bullseye threw the card. It sliced the guards neck. Falling to the ground, he grabbed his neck. Bullseye could hear his heavy breathing already. Stepping over the guard, he pushed the door open and walked inside. He was in a room filled with crates. Most likely the storage room. Not far away, voices could be heard. Ducking behined the crates, he made his way closer and closer to the voices, remaining hidden.

"You got the stuff?" came one voice.

"Yeah." replied another, closer to Bullseye. He heard someone messing around with their pockets, until they found what he wanted. There was a small slam as something hit the top of another crate. Bullseye peeked his head out in between two crates. They were drug dealing. A small sack of cocaine rested on the surface of the crate. One man stood either side of the crate. The one who had laid down the cocaine was his target. "Now hand over the money."

The other nodded as he signaled a guard behind him to come forward. The guard handed over a breifcase to Bullseye's target. Bullseye had seen enough, now was the time to act. He pulled the front of his coat forwards, reaching inside. Taking his hand back out, he held a small pistol with a silencer. Placing both hands on the handle and one finger on the trigger, he aimed upwards, shooting out all the lights in the room. The music outside deafend the sound of his gun going off, leaving everyone inside the stock room with much confusion.

The room was pitch black, people were screaming as glass from bulbs fell over their heads. Bullseyes target drew a gun, looking around desperately. He could make out the man he was dealing with, still in front of him.

"What the hell is this?" the man said,drawing his gun and pointing it at the other.

"I have no idea." the drug dealer replied.

"You better not be fu..." he never finished his sentence. He disappeard right before the others eyes, into the darkness. The screams of the others stopped. The dealer could make out that he was the only one left alive. Bullseye could hear his heavy breathing. He raised his fist, and sent it into his targets face, knocking him clean off the ground. The club music was still going, no one could hear the dealers screams for help.

"Shut up." Bullseye said calmly, letting his foot fly into the dealers face. His foot was damp, blood was on it. "Damn! I just got this cleaned you bastard! There goes another wad of cash outta this job. This stuff is hard to clean you see, I can't seperate my whites from my colours!" he let out a mad laugh at his little joke. "So Ken," he said pulling out a can. "Any last words?"

"M-m-my father will come for you!"

"Sure, sure! They all say that! He's some big time gang lord I bet." Bullseye replied, pouring the can all over Kenny's head.

"You have no idea what kind of man he is. Your stepping in so much s that Galactus would have to shovel it off his foot."

Bullseye laughed as he lit a cigarette. "You know what? It's so dark in here that I can't see my own cig!" he took it out and threw it on Ken. His whole body set of fire. "Much better!" Bullseye said, laughing even harder as the whole room lit up from the fires light. He threw the empty can of gasoline before, still laughing as he headed for the door. Just before he left, he stopped and pickedup the cocaine. "Thanks!" he shouted over the raw of the flames, holding that bag high and shaking it.

In the dark of the night, Bullseye made his escape as the fire trucks pulled up outside the club.

"I knew I should have taken that warning." Bullseye thought to himself. "So I killed your kid an you want revenge huh? Get in line." he said as Beckett peeled off the tape from his mouth.

"At first I planned on doing that." Beckett replied. "It turns out that you can be quite usefull to me though. Victor."

The man who had beaten him pulled a can from his pocket. "Recognize this?" he asked, tipping a liquid all over Bullseye.

"Diet Coke?" he joked.

"Wise guy." Victor replied stepping away.

Beckett pulled out a lighter. "Ironic don't you think? going out the same way my son did?" Bullseye frantically began to twist the ropes that tied his hands together, hoping that by some mirical they would snap. "Unless of course, you don't want to die? That can be arranged. Give me the name of who hired you."

"But I.."

"The name!"

"Escarber Toro!"

"The Columbian druglord? Just as I thought." Bullseye sighed with relief. "Thankyou Bullseye. Untie him Victor." as the ropes left Bullseye's hands, he brushed as much blood away from his head as possible. "Come Victor." Beckett and Victor turned to leave. "Oh and Bullseye. If you wouldn't mind. Could you please kill Toro for me? If not then I understand, I'll just have to make sure I didn't waste all my gasoline. Consider it, repaying a debt." with that, Victor and Beckett left.

"Talk about out of the frying pan and into the fire." Bullseye muttered to himself. "How am I gonna get out of this one? Toro's got like a whole army on his side. I'm pretty sure I won't be able to get through all that. There has to be some way." Bullseye sat back on his sofa, mopping up the rest of the blood. "If I can't take the bullets, I'll have to find someone who can."


	2. Chapter 2

"Yummy, yummy, yummy I've got love in my tummy and I feel like loving you!" Wade Wilson sang along to the radio station as he took the cookies out of the oven. He pushed up his chefs hat as he set the cookes in front of a window.. "Perfect! Those kids won't be able to resist the smell of my home made cookies! And when they get near my window, BAM! Right into the trap! Who'll steal my Playboy issues in the morning then?"

The phone began to ring. Wade wiped his hands on his apron and picked it up, "Good afternoon, Wilson enterprises, Wade Wilson speaking."

"Wilson enterprises? That'll be the day."

"Look if this is another prank call then don't expect me to shout out hey everybody, I. P. Freely around here? Again."

"No you idiot, this isn't a prank! It's Bullseye!"

"Hey Buddy! Where ya been? We have soooooo much to catch up on! Did you know who had a crush on who?"

"Look Wade, I don't have time for this. Just meet me at the usual place at 12."

"Mhm, Hooters at 12, gotcha."

"NO! The OTHER usual place!"

"Oh yeah... remind me where that was again."

"Oh for the love of... Central Park!"

"Right, see ya at 12." Wade put the phone down. He turned back to his cookies to see the plate empty. "No!" he leant out of the window just in time to see 2 kids running off with a bunch of cookies in their hands."YOU PESKY KIDS!" he shouted out at them, shaking his fist in the air. "That's it! I'm calling your mothers right now!" he checked the time. It was 11:30, "Uh oh, better suit up, to the Deadpool room! Alright my closet."

12 at central park. Wade, now in his Deadpool outfit, was sitting on a bench, endulged in a game of Tetris on his gameboy, "Yes! Only 3 more blocks to go and I'm there!" Suddenly, the game was knocked out of his hands as he fell back onto the floor. "Hey cheap shot!" he yelled as Bullseye rolled off of him. "I was on level 10! Do you have any idea how much work I had put into that?"

"Always on about the little things." Bullseye replied, throwing a pair of scissors at Wade. "Long time no see buddy, how are ya?"

"You first." Deadpool said, pulling out a sai and blocking the scissors. He ran an Bullseye, tackling him, sending them both to the ground.

"Me? Well I'm in a whole heap of crap." Bullseye said, kicking Wade off of him and producing his own sai. "Got places to go, drug lords to kill. People wanting revenge for me killing their son's, you know, the usual."

"You think that's bad?" Deadpool said, placing his hand on the ground in mid air, giving him that little extra push that allowed him to land on his feet. "My butler just ate my whole wheel of cheese!" he thrusted his sai at Bullseye.

"YOU have a butler?" Bullseye replied, meeting Wade's sai with his own. They began pushing against each others weapon, in a hope to disarm the other.

"Well, I say butler, I mean some tramp who I get to clean my toilets for one piece of food out of my fridge a day." Wade pulled away from the lock, spinning the sai around his fingers.

"You know he probably makes it scumier, right?"

"Well, at least it saves me the job of having to do it. I don't personally like the rubber gloves Deadpool look."

"I hear that." Bullseye replied, shuddering at the thought and swiping at Wade's feet. Wade leapt into the air, landing behind Bullseye. Bullseye was ready, he swang round, letting the sai cut through Deadpool's skin on his arm.

"Argh!" Wade screamed, "You're lucky you don't have a healing factor, or I'd stick this sai where the sun don't shine!" he lunged his sai forward again, but only to cause a distraction for his fist that hit Bullseye in his face. As he fell back, Wade kicked his hand, making him loose the sai. Catching it in mid air, Wade, pointed both at Bullseye's neck as he lay on the floor.

"I'd have had you if it wasn't for that healing factor then." Bullseye said looking up at Wade. He couldn't see his face, put he could tell Wade was smiling. He began to laugh, as did Deadpool, who handed Bullseye his sai and helped him up.

"So, there a reason to this meeting or is it just a friendly gathering?" Deadpool asked.

"I need your help." Bullseye replied, "but I'll explain back at my place."

Wade took a piece of pizza as Bullseye opened the box.

"So, we kill Toro,and that's that. Though I think I'd like to settle the score with Beckett too." Bullseye explained.

"And getting revenge on his son isn't setteling the score?" Wade asked.

"You know what I mean!" Bullseye snapped.

"EW! This pizza's digusting? Where'd you get it from?"

"Made it." Bullseye replied, bringingtwo mugs of tea into the room.

"Ah that explains it."

"You close the door?" Bullseye asked. As Wade jerked his head around to check, Bullseye spat in Wade's tea.

"Yeah." said Wade turning back round, taking his tea and sipping it. "Now this is more like it! This is the best tea I've ever tasted, whats your secret?"

Bullseye tapped his head, "That's my secret ingrediant."

"I hate it when they don't give away their secret ingrediants." Wade said to himself. "Ok, let's go over this one more time with the help of your craptacualr diagram. I go to the front of the penthouse, and take care of the guards. Meanwhile your sitting outside a secret escape, waiting for Toro to show up to get on his heli-copter. That right?"

"That's about it."

"So, I have to fight off the whole army while you sit there, getting to level 10 on Tertis?"

"All apart from the Tertris bit."

"Alright, but I get over half the reward."

"Oh yeah, um the reward..."

"There is a reward right?"

"Well, he considers it paying off a debt."

"So do I get to kill his other son?"

"If he's got another, he's all yours."

"Deal!"

Bullseye filled his mouth with another bit of pizza. "We'll get to it around 4. I'm gonna get some shut eye until then, wanna be on my best for nailing Toro's ass."

"Yeah, sure that'll be hard." Deadpool replied sarcasticaly. Bullseye ignored him as he headed into his room.

Before shutting the door, he popped his head back out, "Oh and if a big guy called Victor comes looking for me, please kill him." Deadpool gave him the thumbs up.

Bullseye was finding it hard to sleep. Wade kept knocking on the door, asking where the toilet was and he could hear him raiding his kitchens. Outside, Wade was watching T.V when there was a knock at the door. "It's open." Wade yelled. The door handle twisted but the door didn't budge. "Damn, it never is open, I have to get up now."

He got up and went to the door. As he opened it, he found a large, fat man wearing a tight top. It almsot made Deadpool sick. "Uh... can I help you?" Wade said heading back over to the couch.

"Hi... uh, my name is Geff. Is Bullseye in?"

"Nah he's getting some sleep."

"Oh right... what's that on the telly?"

"Doom buggys."

"Oh I love Doom buggys! Let me watch!"

"Alright but don't take up too much... space. Thanks that's great." Then it went silent for a minute or two while they watched T.V. "... wait. Are you,are you touching my leg?"

"Maybe."

"Oh that's just sick! God, Bullseye, where's your bathroom?" Bullseye screamed from inside his room. "Man everyone around hear has issues. Wait... touch me again."

"Oh you like that huh?"

"Yeah, infact I'm gonna take my mask off right now and give ya a big kiss." Wade pulled off his mask. Geff flinched in horror at the sight of Wade's deranged face.

"Oh god! Get it away!" he shouted, running down the corridor. Then the silence ressumed itself until Wade kncoked on Bullseyes door, "Uh Bullseye? I don't know and I hope to god you didn't just hear that but i need to do something manly. What channel is the..."

"648"

"Oh right, uh thanks." Wade sat back down and flicked channels "Hey! That's not funny! Is this so you can entertain your friend Geff?"

"650" Bullseye said, failing to hide his laughter.

Another hour later, Wade opened Bullseye's door. "Wackey, wackey! We got hit the road in about 20 minutes! I got a special Deadpool breakfast cooked up for ya!" Bullseye slowly got out of bed to be greeted to the sight of pankcakes on his table. "Eat up!" Wade said.

Bullseye raised a pancake to his lips. He took a bite out of it. Wade saw the spit go into his mouth. "Wow, these are really good!" Bullseye said, surprised.

"Idiot, he doesn't know I put my spit in their." Wade thought to himself.

"Idiot, he still doesn't know I put my spit in his tea." Bullseye thought to himself.

"So... how's Geff?" At the mention of that name, Bullseye spat his next mouthfull of pankcake out.

"He didn't..."

"Yep"

"Though he didn't..."

"Yep."

"But surely he didn't..."

"YEP!"

"God I'm so sorry."

"Next time, we plan at my house."


	3. Chapter 3

Deadpool and Bullseye stood outside the penthouse suite. Deadpool looked across the Bullseye, who raised his hand into the sky, and started making hand movements, point forwards and backwards and side to side, making corners, loops and the odd two fingers flicking. After he was finally done Wade just kept staring at him for about a minute, "...what?"

"Oh for christs sake! Burst down the door and take care of the guards!"

"And I was supposed to get all that from you having hand spasms?"

"Just do it!"

Bullseye walked off as Wade approached the front door.

Knock knock.

"Who is it?"

"Uh... salesman"

"What are ya selling?"

"Uh... guns?"

"Guns?"

"No! Gum! I sell gum!"

One guard lent across the door to the other "This is why I said to Toro we should get an eye hole for the door! That could be the army!"

"You want an eye hole?" said Wade out loud, drawing a pistol. He fired it through the door, and it went straight into one guards eye. "I sell them too." he kicked the door down, sticking a sai in the other security guard that was standing by the door.

"Oh Toro! I got a surprise for you!" more guards ran for the door, firing at Wade. He drew a small rifle and fired at them, leaving a plie of bodys on the floor. He could hear footsteps running down the opposite way. Must have been Escaber running. "That pesky wabbit. I'll leave him to Bullseye"

Escaber Toro flew down the hall way, running for his life. This maniac was after him and he had to get away. He hit the panel on the wall, letting a piece of wallk budge over to one side. He stepped insdie and closed the wall. Pressing a button on the wall, the floor moved up. As it came to a halt, a door opened and Toro stepped outside. "Jose, set up the helicopter!" he shouted out.

There was no reply. He looked around for Jose. On the wall, he noticed her. But she wasn't moving. Forks had pierced her skin, sticking her to the wall. On her was a note. Toro read in horror as he was told to look behind him. He spun his head round, greeted by the site of a white glove coming for his face. It knockned him over onto his back. He searched desperately for his gun. As soon as he produced it, Bullseye kicked it off the side of the building. He grabbed Toro's neck and dragged him to the edge off the roof.

"Bullseye, whatever they're paying you, I'll quad-triple it!"

"Sorry Toro, they arn't paying me. One thing I wuold like to know though. Why'd you get me to kill the kid?"

"He got Cold Feet, he wasgonna go to the police. He was probably wearing a wire on him when you nailed him."

"Thanks, I'll let Beckett know you co operated." said Bullseye with a smile, pushing Toro off the side of the building.

Deadpool was having a hard time breathing. Toro had more men than he thought could fit into the penthouse! "You know what'd be really funny?" he thought to himself, "If I've done all this then I find out that Toro's killed Bullseye." he apporached a window to see Bullseye flying a heli copter "Shame, would have been great material for my next comedy box." he climbed onto the window and leapt into the air, aiming for the rope ladder that dangled out of the chopper.

At the last second, Bullseye jerked the heli copter out of the way, making Deadpool miss, hitting the roof. He could hear Bullseye's laughter from the sky. "Yeah, yeah. Very funny. Just wait until I get up there and put a hole in that Bullseye of yours.

Wade and Bullseye stood outside Beckett's office. Bullseye held Toro's body in his hands. Victor stood in front of the door. "Wait outside." Bullseye said nudging Wade and winking at him. He entered the office, where Beckett sat.

"Ah Bullseye, I see you have a gift for me! Thank you my lad."

"So I can go now?"

"Ah, not quite I'm afraid. You see there is a little problem about you knowing too much. Victor could you come in here."

"Go figure." Bullseye said.

"Victor?"

"He's not coming ass wipe. It was obvious you were gonna do this." Bullseye drew a gun and pointed it a Beckett.

"Now now Bullseye, let's not go rushing into things. You can't kill me! I... I'm famous! They'll have your head!"

"I've gotten away with it before. Don't flatter yourself, no one will miss you." he fired the gun three times, the first in his crotch, the second in his stomach,the third in the centre of his head. "Bullseye."

He left the room to see Victor screaming in pain as Wade held him up by his hair. "I saved the last one for you." he said to Bullseye.

"Thanks, that's nice." said Bullseye. He hit Victor square in the face, knocking him out and leaving him to drown in his own pool of blood.

Wade shook Bullseye's hand. "Well, this was... nice. We should do it again some time"

Bullseye laughed as he turned his back. "See ya around." the two began to go their seperate ways until Wadecalled out, "Hey Bullseye!"

"Yeah?"

"I have an idea..."

The following thrusday, there was a knock a Wade Wilsons door. He opened it up to see Bullseye standing at the door. "Hey, come in, I got some waffles. No spit this time, honest." They headed into Wade's kitchen. Sitting down, Bullseye began to eat. "So what have ya got?" Deadpool asked.

"James Brown."

"No wait... THE James Brown?"

"It's a common name Wade."

"I know but how cool would it be to kill James Brown? It'd be like living in the Tuxedo movie." Bullseye sighed. "Well I got some one called Lloyd Tenant. Lives around here."

"So say we got get yours first then mine then head off to a bar."

"Sounds like a plan. Don't forget to bring Geff."

"Shut up."

"They're coming!" shouted a worried Lloyd Tenant as his men surrounded him. "Get ready!" The guards aimed at the door. But they were in for a surprise as Wade and Bullseye jumped through the window, spraying bullets down on the guards.

"YOU take the guards this time!" Wade shouted.

"Sure." shouted Bullseye, landing in front of Llyod. "Deadpool and Bullseye at your service sir." he said bowing.

"Oh no you don't!" shouted Wade, firing at Lolyd. With his quick reaction time, Bullseye drew a gun and also fired. Both bullets hit him in the centre of his forehead.

"Bullseye." Deadpool and Wade said at the same time.

End


End file.
